Happy Friday! This past weekend and week have been amazing! I went to Los Angeles and had the opportunity to attend my very first fit expo! I also had no idea what to expect or how this was going to go. To be honest, I was a little nervous. Those feelings of self doubt and lack of self confidence came rushing back. Would I be good enough?, would I fit in?, would they like me?….would I look out of place at a fit expo? I was super nervous! On top of all of that, I was nervous and anxious for everyone I was going to meet. Would they like me? Would I fit in?
I think this is a very interesting topic to discuss and I think something that is so important…more on the fit expo later. I think it is only natural to sometimes have feelings of “I don’t belong” or “will they like me”. One thing that has helped me over the years is to tell myself that “it is not about whether they like me, or whether I fit in.” When I start freaking out and going into panic mode I need to take a deep breath and just calm down. The whole plane ride over to LA (which is less than an hour) I kept telling myself to breathe. I told myself how far I have come on my journey and I deserve to be there just as much as everyone else. At the end of the day, who cares if they like you, what matters is that you like yourself.
Feelings of thinking people won’t like us comes from years of negative self talk and thinking that everyone is more worthy or more deserving than us. For me, especially when I was overweight, this happened a lot. I did not think I was as good as everyone else, or as pretty, worthy, etc. I used to let everyone take advantage of my kindness and I allowed myself to be taken advantage too often. It is still something I am working on, but it all takes time. It takes replacing those old negative feelings and doubts and replacing them with new ways of thinking. New potivie self talk and self love. Telling yourself that you are good enough and that you are beautiful and no matter what you are doing, or for me no matter what I was attending, I deserved be there.
When we landed I was already feeling a little better. I blasted Taylor Swift the whole flight and just zoned out, took deep breaths and told myself over and over again that I was ok. I allowed myself to feel scared, nervous, insecure…I allowed myself to think no one will like me and that I am wasting my time coming. I even allowed myself to still think I was overweight and that everyone would be thinking why is that girl even here.
But after I allowed myself to feel all of those emotions, it was time to get rid of them for good…replace them with new, positive thoughts. Thoughts and feelings that were valid and made me know how worthy I was. I always say that it is always good to allow yourself to feel anything that you are feeling, then deal with it, and move on. I am worthy, and I know that. But for some crazy reason my brain wants to trick me and make me think otherwise…that is where all of the practice comes in and all of the positive thinking and positive self love talk comes into play and say “move it over negative thoughts, there is no room for you here.”
But just like everything else in life, this takes time and practice. Once we arrived at my friends house who we were staying with I was totally calmed down. Surrounding yourself with people who love you always helps in moments like this. I went to bed ready, confident and so excited for what the next few days were to hold.
I met so many inspiring people, had so many incredible opportunity’s and experiences and I would say my first Fit Expo was a huge success. I even got to meet some followers and hug so many of you which was amazing! Everyone I met was so wonderful and I made some new friends along the way too. I also bought my first outfit from Lorna Jane which had been a goal of mine. I also got to go to the Gymshark, Los Angeles pop up shop and meet the amazing Whitney and all of the amazing people involved with Gymshark. I even bought my first items from them which was a huge accomplishment for me! I also got to workout at the Basecamp Santa Moncia location. The whole basecamp family is super loving, supportive and it was so great meeting them and sweating with them!
Overall this trip was amazing and I feel so blessed to have been able to have had these experiences. This trip showed me how much I really have grown as a person. I put myself into a situation where I felt nervous, but I did not let those feelings control me or take over me like I would have in the past. The old me is gone. Sometimes you need to remind yourself of that. The past has a funny way of sneaking up on us, but when it does, we learn from it and grow from it. The past may have helped shape us and get us where we are now, but our past does not control of our future, who we are now does. For me, I am so excited see what my future holds!
Never wonder if they will like you, always worry about if you like you. there is a quote that goes “I no longer wonder if they will like me, I wonder if I will like them.” Be kind to yourself and always always love yourself!
I hope you guys all have a great Friday and a great weekend!
Lorna Jane Girls Were AMAZING!!!!!!
I Absolutely LOVE LOVE LOVE The Doughbar!! So glad I finally got to meet them in person.
So happy that I finally got to give this guy a hug! Possible Pat is such a HUGE inspiration to me!
Besties!!! morganlosing love ya girl!!!
So happy to finally meet danny_getsfit.
OK! This guy right here…more than amazing!!! Heart of gold for sure! Obese_to_beast
MY GIRL!!! Love her so much!!! whitneyysimmons
So happy that I got meet nikkiblackketter Her line with Gymshark is amazing!!! She is so sweet!
My first purchases from Gymshark!!! Mission accomplished!!